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Existential Meltdown

by J.P.B.

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1.
Let It Go 03:43
I wanted to strip the engines away today And get back to basics: Blood & guts & brilliance I was waiting for a playmate To help make some sense of the violence Hate & greed & ignorance The layers of living that you must peel away To get to the secret ingredients May soon lose their flavor, color, & their relevance Let it go, let it go, let it go! I rode a brainwave to an unknown place And picked up the pieces Of shattered thoughts that made no sense I tried to reassemble my dreams some way And clean up my conscience Stranded in the dark, defenseless I tried to pick the clockwork apart And salvage some of the wreckage But the mechanism had been booby-trapped Let it go, let it go, let it go!
2.
3.
Bend Time 02:48
Somewhere there's a feather falling in a puddle in a shady lane Down in the gutter crawling, you will feel no pain Somewhere there's a shadow falling across a face that has no name There's a place somewhere that's calling, you escape the blame Make time, take time, spend time, bend time Send a line anytime, All the pieces fall in line Send a message to your mother, send a postcard to your brother Take a cake to your father, bring a pie for your daughter Somewhere there an angel falling down to the burning lake There's a devil that says "I'm sorry, you've made a mistake." Sometimes when I'm feeling lonely and the world has gone insane I can make believe it's only dreams gone down the drain Make time, take time, spend time, bend time Send a line anytime, All the pieces fall in line Send a message to your mother, send a postcard to your brother Take a cake to your father, bring a pie for your daughter Make time, take time, spend time, bend time Send a line anytime, All the pieces fall in line Take a sample to the doctor, fake the damage to your chakras Make examples of the others, bring the things that shake their feathers
4.
Niche 03:30
There's too many faces I'll never know Too many places I'll never go Too many things I wanted to say So many games I wanted to play I'm not tryin' to be hip I just can't find my niche I'm not tryin' to be hip I just can't find my niche There's plenty of books I'll never read Like so many mouths we'll never feed So many emotions I'll never feel Too many illusions, nothing seems real I'm not tryin' to be sick But I can't find my niche I'm not tryin' to be a dick But I can't find my niche So many lessons I'll never learn And too many bridges I've already burned There's too little time to live with regrets I ain't givin' up cuz I ain't dead yet I'm just tryin' to make a switch but I can't find my niche I'm not tryin' to be a bitch but I can't find my niche
5.
The Prize 05:28
I'm a man without a name, I'm in a band with no acclaim I've got fans but I ain't got fame I ain't got no green and no limousine Hey, but I think I'm gonna change that scene and grab the golden ring And I'm gonna do anything, though I realize the prize has got a price Now I'm living in a dream and nothing's quite the way it seems And nobody's who they are but they treat you like a star Hey, it's a supersonic jet flight that takes you 8 mile high Hey, It's a mega roller coaster ride until you realize the prize has got a price You may say that it's ok, but you're gonna have to pay someday See your sister in a play, play the game that brought you fame some way Hey, you know the price you've got to pay to keep up this charade And you know the hour's getting late and you realize that you've sealed your fate
6.
The rain is falling in, my brain is spilling out My mind is on the outside, but my soul is filled with doubt There's something happening, happening inside My head is full of lies, but I'm gonna set it right If you wanna see something beyond your dreams Look through my eyes, and you'll know what I mean My head is in the clouds, my feet are on the ground My spirit's out in space and it is never coming down There's something happening right before your eyes The people getting wise are gonna cut you down to size If you wanna see something beyond your dreams Look through my eyes, and you'll know what it means High up in the sky, down below the dirt Warning signs reverberate the pain of mother Earth The hurt that's happening signifies a change Consciousness expansion entails some growing pain Gonna make a change If you wanna make it to the promised land Look inside my soul and take me by the hand
7.
Ready 03:03
I've lived a life of such extremes I took the party everywhere with me Cuz I ain't ready to behave or act my age You'll never see the other side of me You'll never see the other side of me I've always lived my life my way I never tried to fit in with "the norm" Cuz I ain't ready to conform You'll never see me be no one but me You'll never see me be no one but me I never had to worry about the things that other people thought about me That's their tough luck And I really don't give a fuck You'll never make me be what you need You'll never make me be a phony I'm always ready with a smile I always have a song in my heart or on my tounge And when it's ready, my song gets sung And if you hear me, join in with me And if you sing with me, sing loudly And if you wanna sing, sing out proudly Yeah if you wanna sing, join in with me
8.
R.A.W.R. 03:31
You were tired of bending, pretending, upending De-friending your last possibilities taken from the shake-down That sent your crew downtown, sucker You tried to make history But still you see that the people that lead you Are the people that deceive you And you know what I really mean When you wake from the dream And it shakes you up, screaming About freedom and peace and equality Cuz liberty ain't some trumped-up hippie ideal, it's the real thing And ideologies evolve progressively We need to shake off the shroud of history Before we strangle on our own hypocrisy So the violence and greed and bigotry That gets served on the plate of conformity Needs to be washed clean, needs to be set free We need to step up potentiality! When I cut loose I throw the dice I roll snake-eyes most every time But I throw it hard and I keep it real I'm a fucking gift card for a happy meal So take the wheel while I take a break Or you're gonna end up right in the lake Where the garbage churns and the river burns Watch out for those hairpin turns If you lose control and spin off the road The coppers gonna throw you in the hole So step it up, don't be a chump Don't wanna spill my drink, so don't hit that bump! It's a travesty, a white-wash Complete and utter hogwash When fanatics malign a systematic decline Your cultural integrity degraded to a fantasy Integrated automation sets the scene for domination Of the destitute multitudes with their outdated attitudes Media misinformation masquerades as education And you know their propaganda needs sneaky dissemination!
9.
Moldy Gray 04:09
Moldy gray, it was thrown away It was in the gutter in the rain Human waste all over the place It’s a disgrace, it’s a shame Don’t close your eyes Don’t close your eyes and look away Shadows fall, curtain call Fuck it all, who’s to blame? Wreck my plans, crush my hands Squeeze my brain like it’s a grape Don’t close your eyes Don’t close your eyes and look away Pieces fall, shadows crawl Shocked at all the hate and pain The world’s a mess, it’s in distress Apathy will seal its fate Don’t close your eyes Don’t close your eyes and look away Moldy gray, it was thrown away It was in the sewer in the rain Vengeful man ruined my plan Withered soul gets blown away Don’t close your eyes Don’t close your eyes and look away
10.
11.
This is just a minor incident It might even seem like a coincidence I didn't even really wanna mention it But if I didn't, I couldn't face the consequence The events that lead to this are simple But the butterfly effect has left a ripple This is such a minor incident So many other things take precedence But if I didn't bring it up I would be negligent So now you know, let's move on to whatever's next The next step must be to proceed And we need to be very careful And we need to realize tiny things Make a difference in our lives So don't neglect the details when you look at the big picture This is just a minor accident You might chalk it up to inexperience If you don't pay close attention, you won't notice it But once you know, you'll always be distracted by the difference The events that lead to this seem plain But the distress it left made stains upon your brain This isn't a major accident But you're acting like they just shot the president So relax and just let me handle this Cuz if you don't stop freaking out it's gonna get me pissed So sit down, take a deep breath, and count to 10 Close your eyes, everything will be alright when you open them And we need to realize tiny things Make a difference in our lives So don't neglect the details when you look at the big picture
12.
I Need Help 03:37
I have always been a stranger My friends don't really know who I am I'm living in a land of imagination Like an ostrich with its head stuck in the sand If you have a clue, please tell me what to do Cuz I need help I don't wanna be a loser I wanna love, and I've got a lot to give But my plans always seem to end up in failure Is the purpose of my life just to live? If you understand, won't you take my hand Cuz I need help Many times I feel like I'm a monster And my life's a catastrophe I wish there was a rock I could crawl under And hide myself away so no one sees My insecurities when they get the best of me I need help And I know that there's a way To make it some day I know that there's a way to be happy But I need help

about

the struggle continues...

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released August 11, 2013

all tracks written, arranged, performed, and produced by J.P. Bartoleit © 2013

album art: "Let The Power Fall" © 2013 J.P. Bartoleit

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J.P.B. Phoenix, Arizona

Hello Earthling, here are some of the samples of the lo-fi rock and musical endeavours which have oozed from the primal morass of my fecund mind, channeled through the spirits. Lust for Life!!!

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all songs written, arranged, performed, and produced by Joseph P. Bartoleit
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